Tuesday, May 31, 2011

More time please

These days, I hardly find room to breathe (literally thanks to Alana's butt in my belly). Every year that passes, I think to myself, we'll I can't get much busier than this, and every year I'm proven wrong. From LVN to RN school, to a job, to planning a wedding and now having a child, I just wish there were more hours in the day. Every day it's work, meetings, home health visits, dinners, something to plan, all while trying to maintain my relationships with my family and friends. I'm a little worried about how things will be once Alana is here!

At work, I literally have my planner propped up on a stand all day, knowing that I'm going to have to jot something down on it. When I see a week empty, I know that it won't stay that way for long. There's always something to do. On top of it all, I'm still trying to find time to squeeze in a few extra visits with Accredited to save up money for my maternity leave. (I'm told by just about everyone that I won't see those checks till I'm about ready to go back to work) I thought that these visits would be easy, but being farther along in my pregnancy is proving to be a little difficult. I can't lift patient's legs to take care of wounds, I can't sit comfortably anywhere in their home because I know I'm going to have trouble getting up, I can't help my patient's ambulate because I can't lift anything heavy and if they fall, I won't be physically capable of catching them. It's so limiting and I hate this feeling of having to ask for help.

However, I think about what I will be getting in return for these minor inconveniences and I still sometimes can't imagine the feeling of actually holding her in my arms but I know that none of these problems will matter once she's here. The only thing I'm really nervous/scared about is the labor/delivery. I told my mom that we will either make really good or really bad patients. Both being nurses, and her an L&D nurse, those nurses at Providence Holy Cross will have their work cut out for them. My only request of my mom is that she make sure that I don't see the epidural needle.

85 more days...