Lucky

Ever since becoming a mother, I've noticed that I see things in such a different light. Seeing the Boston marathon bombing, watching parents anxiously awaiting for news regarding their children in a kindergarten shooting, all of it just makes my heart ache with sorrow for those who have lost their child. 

Today was not even close to those tragedies, but I know that if I had seen it 3 years ago, I wouldn't have given it a second thought. At Food4Less today, I was on my way out of the grocery store and saw a father, cashing out coins in the coinstar machine with his +/- 6 year old daughter asleep on a blanket inside a grocery cart that didn't belong to Food4Less. Now it's one thing to see a small baby or toddler asleep in a grocery cart with a nice clean blanket happily asleep while the parent is shopping. It's another to see an older child asleep on a dirty blanket, seemingly hungry, only sleeping in the cart because she had to. My heart broke at the thought of being that desperate. I could only imagine the feeling of not being able to provide for my kids. He didn't have a car to drive around, she needed to sleep, so he was doing whatever he could to provide without caring what anyone else thought. And although I was sad, I was happy to know that she had a father willing to do whatever it took for her. As I walked away, he smiled at me, then took a look at his daughter and smiled at her. 

I thought to myself, I am lucky. Lucky to have a wonderful family who would never let that happen to me or my kids. Lucky to have gone to school and become a nurse. Lucky to have a job that allows me to provide a roof over our heads and food on our table. Lucky to have a husband who would be willing to do what that father was doing if need be. Lucky to have two wonderful, beautiful, healthy children. Just lucky. 

Happy Anniversary to us

This past weekend, Francis and I decided to splurge and stay at the Grand Californian to celebrate our anniversary. During the date of our real anniversary, Francis was hard at work on Nylanor so we couldn't really celebrate much. On Friday, we booked the room, packed in the middle of the night and were on our way to Disneyland by morning.

I LOVED EVERY SECOND OF IT!

I've been missing Francis lately, especially since he's been taken away by work these past few months. So it was nice to have a getaway for the weekend. Not once did we have to worry about work calling us or what we had to do when we got back. For once, we were actually able to enjoy our vacation uninterrupted. And it was great!!!

To top it off, my sister, Kym, Alfred and Aidan were able to join us on Sunday. Alana tried to feed Aidan a few times but he just wasn't having it. Regardless, it was a memorable weekend filled with nothing but stress free family time...in Disneyland. It was heaven :)

I however, broke the screen on my phone and lost Francis' phone. Was still worth it to me. lol

Back to work

Today I went back to work and luckily it wasn't as bad as I had remembered it when I left the first time. I think it's because I knew what to expect, but moreover, I no longer have the long office hours that I used to have. As a home health nurse I'm more independent and able to do what I need to do and go home when my job is done. No micromanaging needed. However, the downfall to such independence is that there are times when I get delayed longer than expected and I don't get paid to do a good job.

Now there are nurses out there who could care less about their patients and are in and out within 15 minutes. Not to say that all of them are like that, but there are a select few. I am not one of those. I take my time with my patients, make sure I did a thorough job, go through all the steps and make sure that my patients feel secure before I leave. It's a blessing and a curse to be a home health owner. I can't just leave things undone.

But at the end of the day, I'm happy with the work I've done, I love my job and it makes me happy to come home knowing that my family would be proud of the work that I've done. So all in all, not a bad first day :)

2 years

Today marked our 2 year anniversary and I couldn't be happier. Looking back on these past 2 years together has been nothing short of a rollercoaster but I wouldn't take it back for anything. With 2 beautiful girls, a home to call our own, a marriage that will last a million lifetimes, good health, family and friends by our side, life couldn't be sweeter. 

I still can't believe that it has been 2 years since we've been married. I can still remember the feeling of walking down that aisle, baby on the way, with the song "If I Never Knew You" playing in the background. Now I understand why so many people cry at weddings. It reminds them of their own! Since getting married, I can't go to a wedding without replaying my own in my head and wishing we could relive that moment again. But I snap back into reality and remember all the wonderful things that have happened since and remember to live in the moment. 

To my wonderful, supportive, understanding, patient, loving husband Francis, I love you so very much and look forward to spending the rest of my life with you. I can't wait for what the future holds, as long as it's with you. 

Last Days

Sadly, my time with my kids has almost come to an end. These past 4 months have been so wonderful it almost makes me want to have another kid. I SAID ALMOST!!!! Don't worry, we won't be having another baby anytime soon. I'm just going to miss all this time with my babies.

It's been such a happy time for me because I've gotten to watch all of Peyton's firsts while still being there for Alana's. I was able to see her wean off her bottle, walk, learn everything about our new house, run, talk, play games on my iPad and big and little thing in between. I know you moms can relate when I talk about how heartbreaking it is to leave your kids to go to work, only to find that they've hit a huge milestone and you weren't there to see it. I know I can't be there for everything, but when I think about the fact that I only have 1 1/2 years before Alana will go to preschool, I realize how little time I have left for just us. Soon she'll be making friends and won't want to be attached to my hip. I love the way she takes a few brave steps away from me but always looks back at me to make sure I'm not far behind. I'm still happy that I still have a little more time with Peyton to enjoy these things, but I know that too will pass. I got to hear Peyton's first laugh, see the first time she rolled over and held her while she learned to hold her head up. All things that Francis sadly missed because he was at work and I'm going to hate missing the milestones to come. Oh how I wish I was a stay-at-home mom, but unfortunately I'm not. So I try to enjoy every moment, every second that I have with them. It's so precious. I would pay anything to stay in these moments forever.

So until the dreaded first day back at work, I will cherish every second that I have with them because it goes by too fast. They're only 3 and 19 months, but they don't have to be old for me to understand how time flies.

Motherhood is amazing!!!!

This girl is on Fire

It's been a while since I've had a break from the kids and although I'm cherishing every moment with them, the Alicia Keys Concert was definitely worth it. Yes, I love Alicia Keys, her music and her lyrics, but it wasn't really that. The people that came with me were what made this concert so awesome!

Monica, Jason, Michelle, Kimmy and Jackie: Thank you so much for joining me! I enjoyed every second and felt every word because you guys were with me. Whenever I hear "Brand New Me" it will remind me of this concert and you guys. Special shout out to Jackie for coming last minute and for my awesome concert booklet!!! I'll treasure it! Sadly Francis had to cancel last minute because he had to work.

"This Girl Is On Fire...." (listening to Alicia Keys music while writing this)

3 and 19

Today my daughters are 3 months and 19 months and I can't believe how quickly time is passing! Alana is almost 2!!!! Where has the time gone?

Below is the very first picture that I have ever taken where my kids actually look alike! But if you look at them separately you would swear that they weren't sisters. Anyway, in about a month I will be going back to work and believe me when I say that I am not looking forward to it one bit. If it's anything like when I first when back to work after Alana, I'll be balling my eyes out all day. But I gotta do what I gotta do, right? But until then, I will enjoy my precious time with my kids while I have it. Ahhh how I live the good life!